Words by JON CLARKE
We all say this, but let’s say it again - hasn’t this year gone quick? Here we are, merely weeks away from Christmas, and you’ve still not done any shopping. No change there. But there’s time to turn over a new leaf lads, as this year we’re bringing you the Goodwin Smith guide to gifts she’ll love.
Below are five corking ideas that are guaranteed to earn you brownie points, free passes to the pub, and sex tokens. So get your pen out and write these down…
1. Star Map by Posterhaste
Ahh yes, the best kind of gift. Thoughtful, unique, and pretty easy on the wallet. For the record, we do suggest buying her more than just this. Anyway, what even is a Star Map poster?
Well, by selecting a place, date and time of an event (we’re thinking your first date together, first kiss, wedding day etc.), Posterhaste will create a sky map of the stars - exactly how they aligned at that moment.
Available framed, on canvas or as a poster, this would make a wonderfully thoughtful gift for her, and would also double up as a great anniversary reminder to hang on your wall. Never forget that date again. It’s in equal parts gimmicky as it is in ‘aww’ factor - so we give this a solid thumbs up.
2. A weekend away in York
We hear you, why specifically York?! Well, a weekend away anywhere would work well (provided it’s not to a caravan park in Skegness), but York was recently voted one of the UK’s most romantic city breaks. With buildings steeped in history, and pubs and restaurants aplenty, it’s the perfect destination for a couple looking to escape for a few days.
We suggest getting creative with the way you give this gift to her. Maybe put all of the details of the stay inside an envelope, then put it at the bottom of a large box. Fill the box with pans (or other heavy, offensive Christmas gifts). Her face of hatred and confusion will soon turn to joy, as she sees the gold envelope at the bottom!
There’s a whole host of amazing places to stay in York, but we personally recommend the Hotel Du Vin. It’s a little costly, but you get a roll top bath in your bedroom. Who doesn’t want a roll top bath in their bedroom? Just imagine the possibilities!
3. Michael Kors Bristol Leather Satchel
What do girls love more than a handbag? Answer: a designer handbag. The Michael Kors Bristol Leather Satchel range provides the perfect carry companion for any girl with a sharp fashion sense. Available in soft pink, ultra pink, pearl grey and mocha brown, there's a colour to suit any outfit on any occasion.
We advise going for a neutral colour like the grey or the soft pink, as this is more usable and versatile in the real world. The bag itself is large enough to be a daily, but smart enough to complement any dress too. You simply can't go wrong!
4. Christian Louboutin lipstick
Now, we know what you're thinking - £70 for a single lipstick is quite frankly scandalous. But, this is so much more than just lipstick. The female species will tell you that this Christian Louboutin lipstick is the absolute pinnacle, the ultimate, lipstick on sale today.
Buying her this might not look wholly impressive (what, in its miniscule box), but trust us gents, this gift would go down a treat. It shows thought, consideration and the fact that only the very best will do for her.
Now all that is left is to pick the right colour. No pressure, we'll leave that part to you...
5. A puppy (or kitten)
Okay this one takes a little more...commitment. Remember the old saying: a puppy isn’t just for Christmas. If you’ve both talked about the idea for a while, and you’re in a situation where you can adequately look after a pet, then why not consider giving her a little furry friend wrapped in a bow this year?
Pets are a big consideration, so if this is a genuine possibility for a present this year, do your research into what breed would suit your lifestyle. Spaniels are high energy and need lots of walks, while Newfoundlands need plenty of space and lots of grooming - so be aware of these traits before getting one.
Think about it. It’s kind of like a present for you as well. As it’s technically her dog, that means she has to clean it’s poo up, you still get to enjoy all of the fun dog stuff - like walkies and cuddles.
Add to the effect by presenting the little pup to her in a hamper, which is also filled with chocolate, prosecco, scented candles and snuggly slippers.